From Burnout to Breakthrough: Dr. Tomi Mitchell’s Holistic Approach

In this powerful episode, Marcia sits down with Dr. Tomi Mitchell — board-certified family physician, wellness and performance coach, TEDx speaker, and mental health advocate — for a raw, insightful conversation about healing from narcissistic abuse, burnout, and the patterns we inherit without even realizing it.

Dr. Tomi brings her lived experience, her medical expertise, and her holistic framework to help us understand why our bodies react the way they do, why we normalize pain, and why so many survivors stay in harmful relationships far longer than they intended. Together, Marcia and Dr. Tomi pull back the curtain on the three critical relationships that shape our entire lives:

1. The relationship we have with ourselves
2. The relationships we have with our closest people
3. The relationship we have with work and society

When those “three legs of the stool” weaken, everything in our lives starts to wobble — our health, our peace, our identity, and our ability to function. Dr. Tomi explains how this imbalance often mimics ADHD, anxiety, depression, or burnout, and why so many survivors are misdiagnosed when the real issue is untreated trauma.

You’ll hear both women share their own experiences with narcissistic abuse, identity loss, chronic stress, and the long road back to clarity. Dr. Tomi offers a compassionate but direct roadmap for reconnecting with yourself, rewriting your vision, and rebuilding your nervous system after years of survival mode.

This episode is a must-listen if you’ve ever:
 • Felt confused, foggy, or overwhelmed and didn’t know why
 • Stayed in a relationship that hurt you because the unknown felt scarier
 • Lost your identity to people-pleasing or perfectionism
 • Experienced chronic headaches, burnout, or body symptoms you couldn’t explain
 • Wondered if your ADHD symptoms were actually trauma responses
 • Tried to heal yourself while still living in a toxic environment

Dr. Tomi reminds us that healing is possible — but it begins with truth, vision, and the courage to face ourselves. And as Marcia shares, once we do that work, we don’t just survive… we rise, and then we go out and help others rise too.

This conversation will leave you seen, understood, and empowered.

If you want to learn more from Dr. Tomi or follow her work, you can find her here:

The Mental Health & Wellness Podcast: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1754964

Holistic Wellness Strategies: https://www.holisticwellnessstrategies.com/about

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrMitchellHWS

IG: https://www.instagram.com/drtomimitchell/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drtomimitchell/

Transcript

Marcia Williams, LPC:
Today, I am honored to welcome Dr. Tomi Mitchell — board-certified family physician, wellness and performance coach, TEDx speaker, author, and mental health advocate. Over more than a decade in clinical practice, she has worn many hats: clinician, coach, entrepreneur, speaker, and mother. Dr. Tomi is the founder of Holistic Wellness Strategies, where she blends evidence-based medicine with holistic approaches to burnout prevention and mental wellness. Her work empowers high achievers, professionals, and survivors to move from surviving to thriving. Dr. Tomi, thank you so much for being here.

Dr. Tomi Mitchell:
Thank you so much for having me. I appreciate it, Marcia.

On Moving from Traditional Medicine to Holistic Wellness

Marcia:
You’ve built a powerful platform as a physician, coach, and advocate. What inspired you to shift from traditional medicine into holistic wellness?

Dr. Mitchell:
Honestly, I’ve always practiced holistically. Despite what people hear in the media, physicians are taught to think holistically — but not everyone leans into it. As a primary care doctor, you get a front-row seat to family dynamics across generations. And for many of us in this field, the work becomes personal. You start to connect the dots of your own life and lived experiences — especially around traits like narcissism, ADHD, and trauma. Over 14 years in practice, working intense hours, seeing everything… that shaped my understanding of people deeply. My healing journey was really the catalyst. Looking back, connecting those dots helped me see the bigger picture of why I do what I do today.

On How Personal Experience Shapes Advocacy

Marcia:
You’ve spoken openly about your own experiences, including narcissistic abuse. How has your personal journey shaped the way you support others?

Dr. Mitchell:
We don’t live in compartments. Your personal life, professional life, identity — it all overlaps. Empathy isn’t about pity; it’s about genuinely understanding another person’s experience. When you’ve lived through certain realities, especially as a strong, educated woman of color, you see the world clearly. People don’t filter themselves around you — you get the raw version. Life gave me a front-row education. I had a choice: let it drown me or rise from it. I chose to rise.

Marcia:
And choosing to rise is not easy. That first choice is only the beginning.

Dr. Mitchell:
Exactly. People think healing is a sudden pivot. It’s not. It’s trying, getting burned, trying again, questioning yourself, hoping someone will change, believing the best… until you finally understand what’s truly happening. Most people don’t change until the pain forces them to.

The Three-Legged Stool: A Framework for Understanding Our Lives

Dr. Mitchell:
There are three core relationships that shape every part of our lives:

1. The relationship with yourself
2. Your relationship with your significant others or close confidants
3. Your relationship with work and society

These three legs are held together by “struts” — your faith and strength. If one leg is unstable, you can compensate temporarily. But when multiple legs weaken, the whole structure collapses. That collapse shows up as headaches, burnout, depression, misdiagnosed conditions, emotional dysregulation — the body keeps the score even when the mind denies it.

Marcia:
Where were you when I was popping ibuprofen every day, blaming everything but the truth?

Dr. Mitchell:
Girl, I was probably going through it myself. That’s why I can speak this clearly now. My own three legs were collapsing — in my personal relationships, professional environment, and self-concept. Eventually, no amount of faith alone could hold it together. That’s when deep healing began for me.

On Vision, Journaling, and Facing Yourself

Marcia:
You talked about vision — and how you didn’t always have it. Many survivors can’t see anything because their “lens” is foggy with abuse. What do you say to them?

Dr. Mitchell:
Go back to the younger version of yourself — before life conditioned you. Ask that child: What do you want? Children don’t censor desire. Write those visions down. Don’t worry about how — clarity comes through expression. Journaling is crucial.

Marcia:
People avoid writing because the moment it hits paper, it becomes real. And avoiding writing keeps them in denial.

Dr. Mitchell:
Exactly. You cannot heal what you refuse to see. And many survivors stay focused on the narcissist because it distracts them from facing themselves. The work begins with you.

Why Many Survivors Stay

Marcia:
I call it the 50/50 rule. Yes, we need to understand narcissism — but the other 50% is about us. We stay because the relationship meets a need: security, appearance, belonging, identity, fear of the unknown.

Dr. Mitchell:
Absolutely. There’s always a reason. And when someone says, “I can’t leave because I don’t have money, support, or a job,” the real question becomes: What are 30 ways you could start creating those things? If you’re not ready yet, that’s okay. But readiness is what creates change.

On ADHD, Trauma, and Vulnerability

Marcia:
So many survivors recognize ADHD symptoms in themselves. How does ADHD intersect with narcissistic abuse?

Dr. Mitchell:
ADHD increases vulnerability because emotional regulation is often harder and impulsivity is higher. Quick attachment makes red flags easy to miss. Narcissists intuitively spot those traits. But ADHD can also be a superpower — with structure, clarity, and self-awareness.

Medication can help tremendously, not as a lifelong requirement but as a stabilizer while you rebuild your life.

On Healing, Growth, and Making Pain Mean Something

Dr. Mitchell:
I treat people the way I wish I had been treated. Many doctors don’t treat patients with humanity, and that wound runs deep. But you have to turn pain into power. My experiences only make sense when I see the thousands of people I’ve helped because of them.

Marcia:
I feel that deeply. What I went through became my purpose. And together, survivors who have stepped into healing get to go out and help others do the same — one soul at a time.

Final Words

Dr. Mitchell:
There is hope, but healing requires truth, action, and a willingness to look at yourself. You deserve environments that support your mind, body, and spirit — and both professionals and community can help you get there.